Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Love is.. never having to say you're sorry...

hmmm.. what if you say you are sorry yet keep doing the same thing again & again.. does the apology really count? Or if you say you are sorry to someone else, but not the person you offended?.. I am considering more than one incident as I ask these questions. I am considering the same person for all of the above. There is a history of damage done. At what point is enough, enough?

*They were sorry for telling me awful things about my daughter just after she died.. just in case I didn't know..and I think to prove how close they must have been to her to know those things. Afterward they were "sorry" & didn't mean to hurt or upset me.
*They were sorry after upsetting one of my children when they used Kierra as an example (a bad one, after her death) to correct their child in front of mine. Afterward they said they were "sorry" to me.. it wasn't meant the way it sounded. But have yet to apologize to the child of mine they hurt.
*They were sorry after saying an awful, disrespectful thing involving Brian's mother after her death, on the anniversary of our daughter's death. Afterward they have apologized to Brian.. it was uncalled for & they are "sorry". I saw the pain & anger it caused my husband. I have had to deal with the fallout each time this person said something that devestated me or someone I love.

I am glad for Brian that he is of the nature to accept the apology. He has to deal with them. I am not of the same nature & I do not have to deal with them at all anymore.

Don't spew forth a martyrdom speech & expect any compassion from me. I have watched them hurt my family repeatedly. I have heard their apologies & watched them open their mouth & do it again. NO MORE. Sorry has no meaning when it is used as a convenience, rather than a true symbol of regret. When it is simply a word, with no meaning at all...

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