Tuesday, September 25, 2007

From Red Roof to the Ritz..

Brenda went with me to the ranch this past weekend. It was a quick visit, but we had a really good time. Even having to stay at a nasty hotel the first night didn't ruin it for us! I usually stay at the ranch or the Comfort Inn. In almost a year I have never had to stay anywhere else. This weekend they were both full! They had a baseball tournament, a college football game in the next town, a dog show, and a horse show.. all this weekend! The only rooms left were at the Red Roof Inn. It was gross! We didn't even want to take our shoes off! We checked out first thing the next morning and recharged ourselves at Starbucks! We survived it and got a room at the Comfort Inn the next night. I told the girls at the Comfort Inn they were like the Ritz Carlton after the red roof experience!
We had great weather and three great rides. The horses were in good moods and there were no mishaps. Who could ask for anything more?! We got back into town in time to meet Terri, Dwight & the kids at the Shrine Circus Sunday night. It was fun to see the twin's reaction to their first circus. Terri's brother Chris, his daughter and her friend, Brianne, Justin, his sister-in-law, and her 2 daughters all went too, so the kids had lots of laps to sit on and lots of circus food to try. It wasn't a big circus, but it was a good show. I have to get the pix from Brenda that she took for me and I will put them in the photo gallery for everyone to see.

Tortuga 9-23-07

Tortuga 9-23-07
Originally uploaded by mommanana
Isn't she getting big?!

Alexa & Tristan

Alexa & Tristan on table
Originally uploaded by mommanana
Cricket took this 9-1-07. I am forever amazed at how beautiful they are and how they can bring sunshine into my darkest days..

Monday, September 17, 2007

I may be crazy.. probably..

There is a song with those words, don't know the title or who sings it, just a catchy tune. I have been humming it for hours now as I try to finish a project I VOLUNTEERED to do for Hunter's class. I VOLUNTEERED to help in Hunter's class, now I am class mom. I VOLUNTEERED to help one half day each week, now I am covering 2 half days. I also did all the coordinating and scheduling for the VOLUNTEER schedule. I hear or see the word VOLUNTEER and I shudder. I VOLUNTEERED on several sheets for various school activities at Hunter's orientation. New community, new school, I figured it would be good to help where I can. I have also been asked to be the liason between the school and the development we live in. Did I say NO...no, not yet, I said I would think about it. I think this is one of the extremes my friend was talking about!

A big THANK YOU to my sis-in-law, Lisa, for finding the graphics for the kid's pirate day t-shirts. I am ironing on 19 of them as we speak, (ok, type). A big THANK YOU to my sister, Cricket, for helping me get the darn thing reversed. I know it is normally an easy process, trust me, it was a pain in the ---! But it is almost done so I can take them in tomorrow for my afternoon to VOLUNTEER, so they can wear them Wednesday. Oh, I almost forgot.. I VOLUNTEERED to co-chair as zone captain for JACKPOTT in St. Augustine!


Selfish Pleasures..

I have had quite a week. What hits me is that it wasn't really out of the ordinary, just crazy, chaotic, same stuff, different day. I did get to go Kayaking with Terri early Saturday morning. It felt good to get out on the water again. We joined a Jacksonville women Kayaker's group and they are always planning paddles both local and around the state. They have one coming up in North Georgia the beginning of November that sounds like fun. It isn't quite as therapeutic as horse back riding, but close. You are out in nature, no phones, no people other than whoever you are paddling with. It is exercise, but relaxing at the same time. One of my selfish pleasures..
I put myself on a see-saw about being a selfish person, yet I don't think I live a selfish life. I want what I want, but I try to give back and do for others too. I asked a friend about it and she said I go from one extreme to the other. I doubt I will ever understand my own psyche, and I am not sure which comes first.. the things I do for the kids, school, different groups, friends, family, etc. or the things I do for myself.. the horses and, now again, kayaking. I run myself to a frazzle, rejuice my psyche for a weekend, then jump right back in. Or I indulge in my pleasures, then run myself to death to rid my guilt.. use the weekend rejuicers, then do it all again.. hmmm, perhaps a bit of both? I don't even know if it matters.. just one more thing on my mind in the middle of the night!

Friday, September 14, 2007

Chorus of Lady Gray by Cheryl Ladd

Oh, I feel so blue today

I call this mood Lady Gray

Blue is much too bright to be

The way I feel these days

Blue is sky,

Blue is sea

Gray is nothing

just like me.

I think of how it used to be

and it sure gives me the grays...

This is the only part of the song I have remembered for almost 28 years now. I have her debut album and this chorus has run through my head so many times. It seems to fit my mood lately.
Lots going on, just not in the mood to blog about it. I go through the motions and do the things I am supposed to do. I'll try to be more upbeat before I blog again!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Tristan & Brian 9-2-07

Cricket took some awesome shots while she was here for our parent's party.. lots more to come..

click on the pic to see some other shots she took..

Tristan & Brian 9-2-07
Originally uploaded by mommanana
This is one of my favorites!

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Dad, Mom, & kids 9-2-07

Dad, Mom, & kids
Originally uploaded by mommanana
Okay.. here is who everyone is..
Cricket, Dad, Me, Tina, Greta, Tom, Robyn..
then in front is Roy Albert & Mom.

Mom on Roy Albert's motorcycle!

She was actually revving the engine! Later that night I got the chance to ride on this bike with my little brother. We went from my house to North Jax where Greta lives.. a solid 45 minutes to an hour. It was awesome! I will admit my butt was numb by the time I got there, but it was well worth it. Not just the fact that it is a great feeling to be on a motorcycle, but I got to do it with my brother. One of the highlights of the weekend for me!

Friday, September 07, 2007

Alexa with the chimpanzee 8-27-07

These two were so taken with each other! View more pix by clicking on this one and browse through my photo gallery.

Father, Father..

The past 2 weeks have given me very different definitions of that word. I have viewed it from several perspectives and come up with varied opinions. It is just a word after all.. or is it? Father, Dad, Daddy, they all inspire different thoughts and meanings for all of us.

My father, Stanley, died in 1998. I didn't know him very well until I was an adult. I wish I had more time with him. I wish I had known him better. He was my Father.

Kierra called Brian Daddy from almost the day she met him. She always considered him her Father. Even when she was older and met her biological father, she always felt Brian was hers. She changed her name to Shore when she was 20 because she wanted the world to know it, and gave Brian the papers as a gift for Christmas. Those bonds are stronger than if she had been born to him.

Brian has a hard time with the twins calling him Daddy. They call him Papa too, which is his preference, but they call him Daddy more and more lately. The Dr. says it really is just a name to them, we are the ones who attach meaning to it.

Alex came to visit a couple weeks ago. They called him Daddy Alex, Dad, but most often just Alex. They didn't understand who he is or what the term Dad or Daddy means in connection to him. He was someone new who gave them his undivided attention for a few days. He took some great pictures. I will post them on the gallery over the weekend. I took a few at the zoo that I will post as well. He is off to California. We didn't get into any heavy discussions. I think it was all a bit overwhelming for him. It is for me some days too!

My Mom & Dad just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. He is legally my step-Dad, which has never counted for me. He is my Dad. Greta & I threw a huge suprise party for them and also to celebrate my Mom's 75th birthday. (Between that & Alex I have been swamped the past couple weeks.. hence less blogging!) It was full of emotional moments and lots of suprises. No matter what went on behind the scenes, the party was a hit. My Mom said it was all she had dreamed of. My Dad couldn't believe all we had done and that so many of us were there. 6 out of my mother's 7 children were there. And 1 of my Dad's 3 daughters came as well. He was so glad to see her there. I never had a doubt about inviting his daughters to the party. They are his children too. They didn't see him much growing up. There were alot of reasons why. Their Mother has passed on several years ago and they have gotten closer to him as adults. Watching the video was hard for her, and made her realize not all the things she was raised to believe were true. It was an opportunity for old wounds to heal and hopefully bring them closer together. He is her Father, but she doesn't have the bond I have with him as my Dad. His blood may run through her veins, but it runs through my heart. I hope she gets the chance to have that with him. I have never consciously seperated the categories of siblings in our family. My mother had 5 children when she married my Dad. I was the youngest of those 5. My younger brother and sister are their children together. I never considered them anything other than my brother and sister. I didn't talk about them as my half brother and sister. We were all raised together. It was a kick this weekend to introduce them as my "baby" brother and sister! So as you can see, our family tree has many branches. Some stronger than others, some a little weak, but with support they will grow strong again.
Multiple meanings of what a Father is, can be, and should be. But so much more than just a "word".