The sound of his voice..

How strange it is for me to be a parent, a grandparent, yet still feel like such a child when I talk to my Dad. There is something about his voice. We talked for close to an hour on the phone last week. What makes that a big deal is that my Dad doesn't usually like to talk on the phone. We were talking about trips out west he took with my Mom and about making copies of the video they took. So it wasn't really a "serious" conversation. The timber of his words reminded me of when I was a child and he would try to teach me about something, explaining it in detail so I would understand. It was just the sound of his voice.

One of the first times I ever heard him say the words "I Love You" to me was on the phone. I was in England January 1991, Brian had just left in the middle of the night and was headed for Saudi Arabia for the Gulf War. I was in a foreign country by myself with my children and I was scared and alone. I called my Mom & Dad. As we were saying our goodbyes I said my usual I love you, his usual reply my whole life was "me too". This time he said "I Love You Too". I was speechless and tears sprang to my eyes. My fear was forgotten in that precious moment. It was just the sound of his voice.

His voice was barely audible when I first saw him after Kierra's death. He held me so tight as I heard his voice in my ear saying "I Love You". I couldn't even speak. My Mother had so wanted to be the one to comfort me while I cried and I couldn't do it. I couldn't release that part of myself for her. I didn't intend to release that part of myself for anyone. But as my Dad held me and said those words in my ear I could not hold it back. It was just the sound of his voice.

So never underestimate what it means for someone to hear.. the sound of your voice.