The legal side of life..

I can't go into detail, which sucks, but doesn't do much good to dwell on anyway... Had a court hearing on the criminal case Monday.. put off again.. no suprise. Not much more going on there til Sept./Oct. Had depositions for the civil case today, Brian finished, I have to go back another time. The questions are repetetive and range from irrelevent to personal. It brought alot back. My impression of the other attorney... hmmm... no comment. There is an ancient quote about if you have nothing nice to say.... On the other hand.. I could go on for hours about our attorney!!

So this week has been a bummer so far. I think that is why I was feeling so blah the past week. I knew it was coming and there is only so much I can fend off.

I have a heart necklace with some of Kierra's ashes in it. I wear it alot. I wore it today. I spent alot of time rubbing it. It was hard not responding to some of the questions Brian was asked, and even harder not to correct mispronunciation, and misinformation when it was used during questioning. But I stared out the window alot and just kept rubbing the "my heart" pendant.

So now it is dark & rainy outside, which seems fitting for my mood. The twins are napping, which they seem to be growing out of, so I will enjoy it while it lasts! Hunter is supposed to be cleaning up the toys he has all over his room, but is beside me playing more than cleaning!

Our lives keep moving forward even as we keep getting pulled back to Kierra's life and ultimately, her death. Like shifting sand beneath our feet, we are constantly trying to balance ourselves. Never quite able to relax and stand on stable ground. I wonder, even after all this legal crap is said and done, if we will ever feel safe & secure with our lives again. If we will ever be able to look ahead without fear. I guess I will try not to think about it too much today. I will think about it tomorrow.. for tomorrow is another day...