Venting..

There are several situations circling around me and those I love that I am really having a hard time not speaking up about. As most of you know, I am not one to keep my mouth shut.. so why start now?? To save the feelings of those I love I guess.. so here is a generalized bitch session to no one in particular.. unless you are feeling guilty and then I may be talking about you!! Don't ya hate that!?

Why are parents always to blame for how screwed up we are?? Sometimes it may have some bearing, but we all reach an age when we can use the past as a tool to be better, stronger. Or we can use it to whine about it and use it as a crutch, or an easy excuse when we behave badly. At what point, (for some NEVER), do we truly grow up? When do we take responsibility for our own actions and choices instead of falling back on what we believe was a bad child hood? And why do we think it is okay to disrespect and hurt the feelings of someone we claim to love, because we still blame them for years old wrong doings? It seems so convenient to get what you want from them when you want it, then turn the other cheek and be hurtful and disrespectful once you have what you wanted. No matter how you slice it, that is dead wrong. Your parent, or parents, don't owe you anything. If you are not in jail or a psych ward, you are better off than some. If you have people who love you in your life, you are better off than most. So where is the thanks for what you do have instead of the damnation for what you don't? How easy it is to keep your hand out for what they are willing to give, but quick to slap them down with it when they ask for simple acknowledment or consideration in return. GROW UP!!

Then there are those with Peter Pan syndrome.. they will never grow up. No matter their age they are irresponsible. They make excuses, they lie.. whatever smooths over the latest screw up. And they expect you to pretend you don't know, everything is peachy keen, when in reality you want to choke them. Part of the problem is, I notice things, I see beyond what is on the surface. I tend to get "hunches", and on a rare occasion I am wrong. Which means on the rest of the occasions, I am dead on. It sucks. I wish I lived in a bubble. I wish I could flip a switch, put on my smiley face and wipe the slate clean. Wishing doesn't make it so.

Then there are people who had no problem disappearing from the twins lives before Kierra died, yet now send Christmas cards like it is just another Holiday. As tho her death clears them of all wrong doing. BS! I have a box of things for when the twins are older and I put things like that in the box. I have no use for those cards or those people, but what the twins do with them is their choice. Because we all have choices, we make them every day. WE make them, WE choose. If someone else influences our choice, it is because WE let them! So grow up, own your own choices.